#5 From Meth to Meat

AMMONIA: used for EVERYTHING from meth to meat. I don't know about you but I would really like to keep it out of my mouth in ANY form. Tonight while "kid-sitting" a 12 year old he asked what a euphemism is. A euphemism is what makes the difference in imagery when the U.S.D.A. uses "lean finely textured beef,"  as opposed to "pink slime." 

WORDS-NOW GIFT WRAPPED!

A euphemism normally makes a HARSH truth sound polite and often makes the truth easier to accept. Euphemisms are used most often with children. Instead of telling a child that their favorite pet DIED, it is preferable to say that it, "went to a farm" or "swam to the ocean" or "went to a better place." 
The point is not to LIE but to PROTECT. The U.S.D.A. is NOT a loving parent seeking to lessen the burdens of life, they are a department that is RESPONSIBLE for regulating MANY aspects of agriculture in the U.S., long explanation short, the department does not have our best interests at heart. The department helps major food companies turn a profit and that blurs the vision of what is important.

"Until or unless the links that bind public nutrition policy to the interests of agribusiness are broken, we can expect with even greater confidence that there will be something very cheesy about our pizzas, and something a bit fishy about dietary guidance." -Huffington Post

Without being explicit about how appalled I am... I will just be vague and say that if something seems too good to be true, it is. You're not getting a "certified, pre-owned vehicle," ladies and gentlemen, you are getting a LEMON. 

What is in a name? that which we call "lean finely textured beef"  still is the ammonia puréed pink slime.

The 411

Chatty classmates, I must say I am impressed by the new posts and comments around our little BLOGOSPHERE. I was off the grid, to say the least, but now I am back.

My shell is complete, it is pretty legitimate, the fact that I can "hear the ocean" helps. 

I made a siren whistle directly after, complicated, and worth the beautiful outcome. Her high pitch is exactly what I was aiming for...less Little Mermaid and more Pirates of the Caribbean or even Peter Pan. 

Aunt Josie is turning the big 9-0. Her card is on the way out and I am mauling my way through what she last sent in. A book on the "relations of neurology and emotions." New York Times Bestseller and all. After struggling through the introduction of bragging rights the author has, it's been OVER a month and no progress can be reported. I abide by the "don't judge a book by it's cover" rule even if this book is blatantly a "self-help" book. Great protagonists have that moment of uncertainty. 

However, This book LOOSELY translates to an Edna Mode slap upside the head. I will continue staring at it and keep you updated. 

#4 Food Baby

I love food whether it is Mexican, Asian, Greek, or Italian. When I REALLY love my food, I get what many of you know as a "FOOD BABY,"the term itself is a self-explanatory euphemism for eating past a healthy limit. My friends and I even NAME our food babies based on the food's heritage, stereotypically Juan Pablito, Toni, or even Nemo. 
As horrible as we sound, it lessens the burden of guilt involved with eating the serving size that was given to us. I usually pick the healthiest thing on the menu, such as a completely vegan bowl at Chipotle, or a pasta-free dish at Olive Garden, yet I still fall VICTIM to the "finish your plate" mentality. It may be just the Depression-era "waste not want not" ideals handed down, or the inconvenience of taking home a doggy-bag but I find that a "food baby" is a popular predicament. Most if not all Amero-centro holidays thrive on the idea that our eyes are often bigger than our stomachs. 
It doesn't help that most food served is either SALTY or sugary and served with soda or worse. Healthy choices are promoted at many restaurants, many menus now include calorie count, ingredients and point out vegan, "glutard" and or "lactard", friendly. 
With all the eating disorders developing, allergies becoming more dominant, and dieting becoming necessary, restaurants have changed their menus to create a "safe environment" for those looking to stick within a certain lifestyle. However what most do not account for is portion control. 

It may seem that these "healthy alternatives" to fast-food or the freezer section are really helpful and harmless but be prepared to think again. As a society, we have developed an EMOTIONAL relationship with food. We all have our "comfort food" whatever it may be, our "e'ry day" choices, and the late night "munchies."Eating should be an ENJOYABLE yet simple underlying foundation to life yet somehow it has become a showcase event. Taking into account that food companies, no matter how TASTY the product, are still businesses has greatly changed the way I consume food on a regular basis. Falling into a unhealthy relationship with food now seems like a cultural rite of passage in our country, but it SHOULD NOT and DOES NOT have to be that way.

How you doin'?

...in a mobster voice and accompanied by a "head nod" is probably one of THE most quotable pick-up lines.

For my Communication class I had to bring in less popular yet used pick-up lines. My class is taught by an older(retired) male professor and on a good day, seven of twelve classmates will show. I know everyone's name and life story by now yet saying pick-up lines in front of them would be uncomfortable. This was magnified by the specification made that I was only to use lines that I heard or I used.

I settled on two equally cheesy and safe lines. 

“I'm Mr. Right, someone said you were looking for me?” 

“Do you believe in LOVE at first sight? Or should I walk by again?” 

When I got to class the guys had plenty of dirty lines that would have made ANYTHING I brought in seem normal. I shared my two lines and was content with a clean slate assignment. I would not normally care so much about my assignment but my professor is always trying to share his "worldly wisdom" on dating and relationships. To be clear, I really did NOT need the casual yet obvious, “Oh you’re single? Oh so is so-and-so! How interesting...” comments that follow. Pick-up lines are dirty, cheesy, over-used, and above all AWKWARD. 

I started to think about makes people resort to pick-up lines and if talking to strangers of the opposite sex, has always held such an inept connotation. 

I could pin this on the "use of technology" and "the decline of social interaction" but I REFUSE to believe that genders have communicated without misunderstanding and difficulty EVEN BEFORE the internet. 

Pick-up lines are commonly used when a man thinks he is "out of his league" or desperate. For instance, older men to younger women or the Barney-Stinsons of the world to normally decent women. 

But all too often, instead of coming off with “moves like Jagger,” they comes across as Urkel.

The example one of the men in my class gave was, 

“Great legs, what time do they open?” 

While typing this I’m laughing, if someone came up to me and said this I would smack them or look for the NEAREST security. 

So what works? 

Honestly, if someone was interested yet a stranger, a simple SMILE, and, “Hi my name is _____,” is all that is needed. It leaves little to interpretation, if there is suddenly a lack of CHEMISTRY in the conversation, one can walk away unscathed, and there’s a better chance of walking away with a number instead of a slap to the cheek. 

I’m no, "Dear Abby" but even the internet cannot justify the serious use of pick-up lines. 

John Stamos tried, but could not cure the Urkel.

This post is very female minded and female to male, and I apologize for anyone who can’t relate but I can only speak from experience but please comment and share your experiences!

#3 Hypnosis

Walle is a satirical movie, even though most of the movie is silent, and the movie was originally intended for children, the truths presented are targeted towards ADULTS. The robots in the movie seem more personable than the actual humans in the movie seem. Walle is frantic to find Eva, talk about ROBOT LOVE. Sweet as this pursuit may be, it is calling attention towards the emotional relationships that the humans are lacking.

Don't stare too long.

The scene in which the people are rotating around the "cruise ship" with robots attending to their needs reminded me of an home for the elderly. Choices seem to be non-choices, preference decisions without a significant impact such as what color shirt to wear. 
The technology used allows the characters to transcend the PHYSICAL reality.
This is paralleled to today's use of technology to tune out the physical world and tune into ourselves. 
We are enchanted and even hypnotized by technology. A hypnotic state happens when one's mind transcends reality. That is what listening to music all day or constantly being on the internet does is send an individual into a state of hypnosis.
Maybe it's nice to slip into a state other than the usual RUSH and stress of everyday life, whether that is tuning into headphones and tuning out the world or CRAWLING into a dark movie theater for "shelter." Watching this movie and maintaining my grip on the lens of reality made me think twice about sitting behind my screen all day.

Failure to Comment

Our classmates are writing topical posts while I just write about myself. Compiling a well-developed database of all personal thoughts and information, such as Facebook, or "please-stock-me.com" is highly APPLAUDED by society. 

If you do not know what this is from,
 Please, CREEP this way.

To express my concern for YOUR boredom as a reader I have catered this post to IMPROVEMENT, so comment, criticize and critique! 

Because you cannot "POKE," "STALK," or "CREEP."

I noticed that I am not alone under the, "FAILURE TO COMMENT" label. I read your blogs sporadically, scout's honor, but I have NOTHING to say after reading, a rare event. 

If you write about something in which YOU are invested, it is indubitably stupendous, and I commend you. 

IF I do not comment:

A. I am LITERALLY speechless.

B. Word vomit has been spilled on your blog.

C. I was LOST in interest jargon and no longer feel qualified to comment.

 D. I want to replace the title with, "#AssignedBlogPostNumberIHateYou."

E. I could not "prove" that I am not a ROBOT.

To quote my professors, "If you don't WANT to write it, I don't WANT to READ it," at all, EVER. 

Write about something YOU like or even how much you hate my blog, I DARE you.

#2 Technologic Zombies

Technology runs OUR lives, from the transportation one uses to the medical care one receives. All this innovative technology is seemingly futuristic.Feeling the need to keep up, individuals buy into each upgrade thinking it is BETTER than the last(think Apple products). Being a Girl Scout(laugh now, then think of the cookies)one of the many montras was to,"leave everything BETTER than you found it." The definition of better seems to have changed since I learned that. 

Better used to mean 

"improved," 

now it seems to mean,

"self-serving regardless of the consequences." 

I think there will always be WAR, violence and genocide until it ends us. But with all this "improvement" our waste is literally TRASHING the planet. As if we have another planet that could sustain our lifestyles. Contrary to popular belief, I am no better than this, I am no better than you. 
The fact that I am typing this on a Mac, may make you think so but then again what is your definition of better?

In the article by Robert Samuels, "Breaking Down Borders..." I found his idea that,

"there are new rules for how to act in public places and how to socialize with and around one another" 

was completely relatable to my own experiences. He attributes it directly to technology,

"none of these changes would have happened without new technologies to break down borders." 

This statement led me to question what borders we are PUTTING UP in place of these technological ones. The idea of making basic eye contact with a passing person has

been OBLITERATED. I feel society has developed a social border against anyone face-to-face, it seems everyone in person is on a need-to-know basis. Is this better? 

I am partial to the positive convenience of technology. I feel that society is moving so fast, that even a week seems like an eternity(just imagine a week without your most beloved piece of technology). Everything in person seems replaceable by content online. 
I love having access to endless libraries of art, music, and writing by people who are in history books or just next door, directly at my fingertips. Call me a "hipster" or a "purist" but I don't watch T.V., I don't listen to the radio, I stick solely to the internet and I buy into convenience. Fortunately I still have a few redeeming qualities left, the main one being that I am human. I'm sure you think I live behind this screen however, I love live music, breathing the not-so-fresh Phoenix AIR, and saying "hi" to random strangers. I wouldn't trade the human experience for the virtual experience. Even if it is less "awkward" for some. Here's the video.